preschool is going to kill me.
today was like a little preview. ella had her first gymnastics class. her first class without mama. she wailed. cried. hollered "mooooooooooom" like a cow in labour. sucked her fingers out of total fear and anxiety. wailed. stared bug eyed at me from across the huge gymnasium.
and i had to sit in the fucking bleachers and watch. it was not good, people. my heart ached. it was a good thing my mom happened to be along or i'd have probably caved and gone running to save her.
she made it through the full hour. participated in most of it. (said no to some, i saw.) even tried to muster a smile at one point. but oh, man, she cried tears of relief when i finally met her at the end.
